HFEA<\/a>, so with hundreds of couples wanting to start their families with donations, that means a long wait.<\/p>\nThankfully, Angela and her husband were offered an egg by a relative, meaning they would not have to join the queue of potential parents waiting for a donor egg.<\/p>\n
\u201cWe are very close to her and her husband, and knowing what we were facing, she offered us one of her eggs. We had a serious, semi-formal conversation with them, and asked her, \u2018If this works, how would you feel?\u2019 and she said it would just be an egg to her, and she certainly wouldn\u2019t see it as her child \u2013 it would be ours. I did have some reservations, but we went through with it, and I got pregnant. But we lost the baby at six weeks. It clearly wasn\u2019t meant to be, but I\u2019m hugely grateful to her for her generosity.\u201d<\/p>\n
After this devastating news, Angela began researching the possibility of travelling to a fertility clinic overseas and undergoing the egg donation process there. \u201cI wanted to move on,\u201d she says. \u201cIt had consumed me for so long. The clinics I spoke to were so different to the NHS hospitals I\u2019d been treated at, and I ended up creating a spreadsheet to assess the advantages and disadvantages of each of them, spending a week just looking at all of them properly.\u201d<\/p>\n
Angela chose five to investigate further, and then selected the Spanish clinic she wanted to go to for treatment based on her relationship with the staff she spoke to as well as the chances of success. Since then she has begun treatment there, with consultations and tests, which verified everything the NHS hospital had already told her.<\/p>\n
\u201cThey confirmed that I have no eggs, and we started treatment immediately. I thought we\u2019d have to wait until my next cycle, but no \u2013 we have the egg transfer in a couple of weeks.\u201d Selecting the donor was another stressful experience. \u201cWe wanted to choose someone who matched my physical characteristics,\u201d says Angela, \u201cand the clinic has been really encouraging, which is what you need with a couple who are so anxious and who have waited for so long.\u201d<\/p>\n
Finance is often a worry for British couples seeking private medical treatment, and egg donation abroad can prove very costly as the fee takes into account the recompense given to the donor. Angela and her husband have chosen to take out an interest- free credit card, as they have no substantial savings. \u201cWe\u2019re both working full-time, though,\u201d she says. \u201cIt\u2019s just one of those things. If it doesn\u2019t work out, then we\u2019ll be \u00a39,000 down.\u201d<\/p>\n
Angela says that there has been no strain on the marriage as yet. \u201cMy husband is lovely and very laidback \u2013 he wants whatever makes me happy,\u201d she says. \u201cHe says he didn\u2019t marry me for kids, he married me for me. His side of things is obviously fine, so if this works out we\u2019ll have a baby that\u2019s ours, even if it\u2019s not mine biologically.\u201d<\/p>\n
Pip Morris advises anyone planning to copy Angela to do exactly the same amount of research and preparation.<\/p>\n
\u201cDo your homework,\u201d she says. \u201cI\u2019ve heard of people going abroad to get a donor egg implanted, and then when the baby is born the donor is named on the birth certificate, which obviously has huge implications for the child and the donor herself. Find out what the policy is in the clinic and in the country if you\u2019re sure you want to go abroad for treatment.\u201d<\/p>\n
One obvious problem could be a language barrier – if an English- speaking couple travels to the continent for treatment they may find themselves in highly emotional and jargon-laden dialogue with clinic staff who may not have English as a first language.<\/p>\n
Shelley Smith, the founder of the Egg Donor Program in southern California, says many women have opted for a clinic in Spain or Greece simply because travelling from the UK to mainland Europe is easier than crossing the Atlantic, but attitudes are changing. She recommends researching all the options properly before committing to a particular clinic. \u201cHere in California, it\u2019s further for British women and couples to travel, but our doctors are very successful,\u201d she says.<\/p>\n
Smith started her clinic nearly 20 years ago when few people had heard of the process. Now, women in the area donate for a variety of reasons, only one of which is the financial recompense \u2013 and that is quite significant, with first-time donors receiving $7,000. \u201cOften donors find it really fulfilling to help someone who has been struggling to get pregnant,\u201d she says.<\/p>\n
\u201cThe advent of the internet has really changed the egg donation process, because now people can log on and have instant access to so many possible donors.\u201d<\/p>\n
When a woman chooses to undergo the egg donor process at Smith\u2019s clinic, the procedure begins with a short phone consultation explaining what will happen as well as the cost.<\/p>\n
\u201cWe reassure them that nobody will be able to take the child away from them \u2013 that it will be their baby, and then we can start to match them with people,\u201d says Smith.<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s wonderful to go on to a website and read about the donor\u2019s family history, but with us, they can also talk to someone who knows her. We think it\u2019s important for clients to find a donor they can connect with; it just makes it an easier and more joyous process.\u201d<\/p>\n
The UK is one of Smith\u2019s largest overseas bases, with numbers steadily on the rise. \u201cIt\u2019s an expensive process, but that\u2019s often the case wherever couples seek treatment. For those coming here, it\u2019s a long way, but it\u2019s the whole experience that\u2019s important, while for us, we enjoy working with British patients for what we call \u2018the gratitude factor\u2019.<\/p>\n
They are so nice,\u201d she says. \u201cThey know they won\u2019t be able to do this process at home until they\u2019ve spent three years on a waiting list.<\/p>\n
Here, they can look through our database, and they\u2019re genuinely excited to see all the donors, whereas American clients have always taken it as read they\u2019ll be able to pick whoever they want and keep to quite exact criteria. British clients always tell me, \u2018I could choose any of these women!\u2019 We know how much it means to them.”<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Part Two in our exclusive series on undertaking fertility treatment away from home sees us examine the idea of obtaining donor eggs from abroad, as Carrie Dunn investigates… According to the National Gamete Donation Trust, around 800 babies are born in the UK every as the result of donors eggs or sperm. In the UK, […]<\/p>","protected":false},"author":39,"featured_media":4205,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"apple_news_api_created_at":"2019-07-19T17:04:19Z","apple_news_api_id":"37285711-b8e1-4643-8fd1-6d5104c680eb","apple_news_api_modified_at":"2022-01-09T13:47:28Z","apple_news_api_revision":"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACw==","apple_news_api_share_url":"https:\/\/apple.news\/ANyhXEbjhRkOP0W1RBMaA6w","apple_news_coverimage":0,"apple_news_coverimage_caption":"","apple_news_is_hidden":"","apple_news_is_paid":"","apple_news_is_preview":"","apple_news_is_sponsored":"","apple_news_maturity_rating":"","apple_news_metadata":"\"\"","apple_news_pullquote":"","apple_news_pullquote_position":"","apple_news_slug":"","apple_news_sections":[],"apple_news_suppress_video_url":false,"apple_news_use_image_component":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[21],"tags":[68],"acf":[],"apple_news_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/fertilityroad.com\/sk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/28099"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/fertilityroad.com\/sk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/fertilityroad.com\/sk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fertilityroad.com\/sk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/39"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fertilityroad.com\/sk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=28099"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/fertilityroad.com\/sk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/28099\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":61337,"href":"https:\/\/fertilityroad.com\/sk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/28099\/revisions\/61337"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fertilityroad.com\/sk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/4205"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/fertilityroad.com\/sk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=28099"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fertilityroad.com\/sk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=28099"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fertilityroad.com\/sk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=28099"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}